Finding Romance During the Pandemic?

It’s 2pm in Canada, 1pm in Iowa, 8pm in Paris, and 7pm in Lagos. The fan whirrs emphatically as I gauge how long it will take for the men and women in each of these countries to reply to the messages I just sent out on Tinder, which I just downloaded. I’d never had an interest in the app all this time because I just assumed it would end in tears. But a pandemic was all the excuse anyone needed to venture into places that we ordinarily wouldn’t, and I wasn’t alone: the hilarious take on people’s bios about how Covid19 made them download the app had me sold.

I used to be the person who shouted at the screen when characters would just stop and start talking about romantic inclinations in the middle of an aggravated situation like Denver and Rio in Money Heist, or any protagonist finally sharing a kiss while the heavens rain fire and brimstone. The bomb will literally be about to go off and yet, there they were. Living through a pandemic, I’m beginning to see that these opposing reactions may not be so opposing after all.

Where people are threatened by distance and keep away from each other, it increases the intensity of the human need to connect and when things are falling apart, it is all the time to fall together. Like Tom and Jerry, the two may be opposing in thought but go side by side.

There are reminders of the fact that deaths and the numbers climb on the chart every day, yet, I worry about the fact that I desperately need to visit a salon. The world is restricted from touch and at the same time, I think about what life will be like with a partner you can trust.

There’s no point remembering whether today is Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday. At this point, it’s just day. I say my prayers and thanks to the gods of Lagos Traffic for yet another day of pardon. An invitation to a birthday party on Zoom chimes in and I wonder if people are supposed to dress up for these things? Later on, I would decide against dressing up and show myself barefaced, sitting on my bed, and watching other people stare at other people staring at other people while bobbing their heads to music.

The thing I love about virtual meetings is that you can be in two meetings at the same time without moving an inch, but sometimes I’m left in a crisis because look at me just walking around and chewing loudly while I’m on mute. I take a moment to really appreciate the advances of technology; is there nothing you can’t order from the internet? I’ve thought about a reason to go out, but everything is online–food, groceries, even water.

Imagine if COVID19 came when we were still using Nokia torchlight phones, that would have been it. I wonder if we would even have known what was happening. Would we have attributed the deaths to village people? Wait, what if this has happened before?

Oh, by the way, I’ve deleted the Tinder app. I decided swiping through random people’s videos was a better way to spend my time, at least you get to connect with people in a different way.

The name “Tik Tok” is apt because each time you open the app you can feel your life ticking away as one video after the next pops up on your screen with the whole world being challenged to do one thing or the other.

In the time I’ve spent, I’ve seen mothers, fathers, grandparents pranked, challenged, and dancing. I’ve done that so much that I feel I can write a PhD thesis on Life in COVID19, the need for human performance as entertainment and how connection is the real currency in the world.