Counting down to retirement, another year of work bites the dust.
If you’re anything like me, then you’re often confused about what to do with the Christmas holidays. I’m just glad we’re finally getting a similitude of what the end-of-year season used to be, with concerts, shows and fests fully coming back.
It apyas there is a new opp though. The prices of these tickets to shows and parties are not only through the roof; they will take the roof off somebody’s head. Entertainers have decided they’re now tech bros and want to earn in dollars. So, I got to thinking, is it not better to host mine? And if I did, what would the lineup look like using the hottest Nigerian talents, based on the trends of the year?
No past glory; just based on 2023, this is what my selection will probably look like.
DJ: DJ Obi
DJ Obi successfully blessed Monday nights with high-energy beats. Throughout the year, he threw a weekly party, DJ Obi’s House, that has become a movement and a platform that has launched emerging DJs and musicians into the spotlight.
MC: Ebuka
As long as Big Brother Naija remains Nigeria’s most followed show, and Ebuka is retained as its host, we might as well just keep giving the Ballon d’Or to Messi. Not taking anything from the dude, he’s got the style, knows how to spark controversy, and create conversation.
Hypeman: Do2dtun
This energy god once again takes the top spot for me, retaining the title of King of Hype in Nigeria. Although I did not attend a lot of parties this year, I still got to witness D to the O to the 2UN. While I’ll accept that hype personalities like Emmyblaq who gave us ‘small nyansh dey shake’ in 2021, have become one of the most heard club voices of 2023, in the case of a party, I’d give it to Do2dtun.
Chef: Hilda Baci
She is without a doubt the hottest and I mean, the hottest chef of the year, after breaking the Guinness World record for the longest cooking marathon. Obviously, I’m not picking her for the food, because GWR didn’t tell us if the food dey sweet. If you know Governor Sanwo-Olu or anyone else who went for the tasting, please let us know.
Artistes:
Trust me, this one was a very hard task, but I settled on Davido, Shallipopi and Odumodublvck, the Big Kala.
The shelf-life of Davido’s Timeless album outdoes all other indigenous ones this year, with tracks like “Unavailable” and “Over Dem” still featuring on several curated lists. Although I have almost zero love for Shallipopi, I can’t deny that he made great waves this year. His music is sure to get any party crowd going. Big Kala, a personal favourite, had hits from “Declan Rice”, “Dog Eat Dog” to “Blood on the Dance Floor”. Ngl, it was his year too.
If I was allowed a fourth, it would be our celestial angel, Arya Starr. This selection was particularly hard as there were equally great acts all through the year; Omah Lay, my afro-depressionist; Kizz Daniel; and Asake, to name a few.
Still, RIP Mohbad.
Comedian: Layi Wasabi
Layi might not be a great on-stage act but having him around would be a sure vibe.
Dancer: Poco Lee
This year Poco had stiff competition from acts like Izzy Odigie, Korra Obidi, and the Girls Got Bold dance crew, but I’d still give it to him. You should check out these other guys on the gram too.
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With the appropriate funds, this is what the lineup of my private party would look like. Let me know yours in the comment section.
NB: If you’re planning not to have maximum fun this December, know that December starts on a Friday and there will be 5 weeks of it. Your budget will not survive either way.
