I have a very funny relationship with Love. I believe in it, admire its beauty, but I\u2019m mostly annoyed by it, regardless. Or was that was how I was? I dunno.<\/p>\n
I once had a small argument with a friend (since we all apply that term loosely these days). Some dude said you can let someone go even if you love them, especially when you\u2019ve still got a fair share of demons to deal with. I agreed. My friend disagreed. My explanation was that there\u2019s an ideal and then there\u2019s the reality where 1+1 isn\u2019t always equal to 2.<\/p>\n
It was easy to agree with the dude because I let someone I loved go once \u2013 heck, more than once but a particular occasion stands out. Looking back, I\u2019ve got no regrets even if she still abuses me from time to time for chickening out.<\/p>\n
Chickening\u2026 Not sure this is a good term to use this season.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n What it also made me realise was that once you love someone, it doesn\u2019t necessarily degenerate into hatred even if it doesn\u2019t work out. Most times, one person is just mad at the other person for messing things up.<\/p>\n That\u2019s by the way sha.<\/p>\n I don\u2019t know if this is a weird way of looking at love. I\u2019m one person who doesn\u2019t like taking what I say back so imagine if you say you love someone today and you\u2019re gone tomorrow. Does it still make sense?<\/p>\n I used to think it doesn\u2019t, but now I think it does make a lot of sense.<\/p>\n Mostly we associate love with permanence due to our human need to always control outcomes, but what can we really control? Not a lot. And when we realise this, there\u2019s a tendency to give up altogether because the flipside of such a belief is that it\u2019s an illusion. And when we think it\u2019s an illusion, we\u2019re not eager to say how we feel about people for one messed up reason or the other.<\/p>\n But it\u2019s not an illusion. When you honestly love someone, you love them. Period.<\/p>\n I\u2019ve once been told that I was loved by someone, and I was quick to dismiss it. I wondered what I\u2019d done to deserve it and couldn\u2019t figure it out. Let\u2019s just say that my response was\u2026 meh. I was like, \u201cNne, what kind of love is that; are you, Jesus?\u201d<\/p>\n But as we kept talking, I was made to realise that it had very little to do with me and all to do with that person and how they feel. Love isn\u2019t always mutual. It\u2019s beautiful when it is, but when it isn\u2019t, does that make the love any less valid? Nope.<\/p>\n And with this realisation, I ended up telling someone I loved that I did, after almost ruining it by not saying anything because I was too worried about a future I had no control over. Because I wanted to be sure I did. I was making my concerns over what I couldn\u2019t see, damage what I had at that moment. We\u2019re quick to say that we should also live in the now, but we hardly do, especially in Nigeria where the government has messed even the present up.<\/p>\n But we can make the most of it. That person might not be there tomorrow \u2013 not necessarily due to death, but circumstances. So when you get a chance to be happy and tell people they are loved, just say it. Even if shit happens, if their head is correct, they\u2019ll remember that they\u2019re loved.<\/p>\n Because what you do now is sometimes the most important thing you\u2019ll ever do.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I have a very funny relationship with Love. I believe in it, admire its beauty, but I\u2019m mostly annoyed by it, regardless. Or was that was how I was? I dunno. I once had a small argument with a friend (since we all apply that term loosely these days). Some dude said you can let […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5224,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[33],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5223","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-features"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5223","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5223"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5223\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5227,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5223\/revisions\/5227"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5224"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5223"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5223"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heirsholdings.com\/hhpeople\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5223"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}